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I had so many theories about raising my kids, and all kinds of signs that, at first, supported my fairy-tale ideals. A purple dinosaur showed me how courteous everyone was on the school bus. A blue puppy said we could be anything we wanted. And all the coaches and teachers and doctors and neighbors in BusyTown USA always smiled and tipped their hats, ready to lend a helping hand. Now if God were Richard Scarry, the world would probably be that way. But I’m thinking he’s more a Lemony Snicket fan.…
Renee Antonelli Valente
I look at things differently now. There’s no guide to help THEM them study the playbook of life, so who says we should get one? Just like our kids, no matter how well prepared we are, we’ll often forget to “state the answer in the form of a question” while giving the host that goofy look.
Parenthood is really a game where we have to rely on conscience and common sense, where we referee from the nosebleed seats: You can sort of make out a bunch of little people scurrying around, a few flags thrown on the field, but you have no clue what anyone is saying and can’t really tell who threw the first elbow.
The trick is trying to raise healthy, well-adjusted children with a sense of conscience and morals, even though you know that advising them on the politically correct way of “talking it out” with a bully should be replaced with “just kick his ass.”
For their sakes, we have to find a balance: a way to present them with a world that prepares them not only for success but for failure; one that helps them work through adversity and not be afraid to face it; and a way that empowers them not only when things are right but when they go wrong, as well.
We so desperately wish we had all the answers. But how many times are we left hitting the buzzer only to stand there, dumbstruck, while Alex holds that index card, waiting for a response that ends up: “Um….”?
Lets face it: The world is a marvelous and absolutely incredible place where we truly CAN be what we want to be. But we all drop a few easy touchdowns or fumble near the goal line. It’s how we handle the goofs that count. THAT’S one of the lessons we must teach them.
In the end, it’s simple, really: Get up when you fall. Pick up that ball and run like hell to the end zone. And remember: Every once in awhile, you’ve gotta throw the Hail Mary.
She moved to Wayne, but this Union (City) Hiller never left her city roots. Renee Antonelli Valente is a true ‘tweener’, book-ended by a feisty mom in her 70s and her own inquisitive grade-schoolers. Still, she finds time to rock out.
MORE FROM RENEE:
For service and devotion, you’d think I deserve a fair promotion
Filled out one of those invasive forms for a discount at the mall the other day. Simple enough. And although I am a freelance writer and photographer, I don’t have a place per se to hang my occupational hat, so I checked “housewife.” “I’m sorry, ma’am,” the sales twit — er, clerk — said. “You have to have a real job to qualify for this offer.” WHAT??! CLICK HERE….
Amazon brings us The Bill of Pedophiles’ Rights
There must be a WTF section in our bookstores these days that I’m not aware of — somewhere between the Religion and Ethics aisles — for something like Amazon.com’s recent addition, The Pedophiles Guide to Love and Pleasure, to be allowed. CLICK HERE….
When the right thing to do isn’t ‘correct’
I was on line at the bakery behind a woman whose boy has Down Syndrome. As they left, both turned and said goodbye. “Ugh,“ the woman behind me said once they were gone. “To have a child like that, the poor little bastard.” … EXCUSE ME?
‘Tickle Me Katy’ isn’t the end of morality as we know it
First, she kissed a girl and made people scream. Now, she’s dressed provocatively in front of a beloved Muppet. Giving new meaning to Tickle Me Elmo, Katy Perry has brought the morals police out in full force. But is it really that big a deal? Or are our censors senseless? CLICK HERE….
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