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Website Adds Up The Numbers, Finds Westport Among 'Most Boring Towns'

A website recently ranked Westport on its list of "Most Boring Places in Connecticut." How an a town with a Patagonia shop be boring?
A website recently ranked Westport on its list of "Most Boring Places in Connecticut." How an a town with a Patagonia shop be boring? Photo Credit: Jay Polansky

WESTPORT, Conn. — RoadSnacks.Net believes that Westport is among the most boring towns in Connecticut. But rest assured, the designation is purely statistical. 

“We didn’t use personal opinion when it comes to what classifies a city or town as ‘boring,” wrote Sam Sparkes, the article’s author. “We crunched actual numbers to figure out which towns are statistically more boring.”

The website also features other equally cheerful but statistically based articles — citing scientific fact, of course —such as “These Are The 10 Worst Places To Live In Delaware”  and “These Are The 10 Worst Places To Live In North Dakota.”

RoadSnack’s secret formula ranks towns based on the age, marital status and density of the population. 

Older population? More boring.

Younger population? Less boring.

Married? More boring. 

Married with kids? You guessed it: Even more boring.

Westport comes in at No. 8 on the “Most Boring Places in Connecticut” list with 63.02 percent of the population over 35, a median age of 45.3, 64.56 percent of married households and 41.68 percent households with kids.

“While Westport is near the ocean (making it automatically less boring than some other towns and cities on this list), it’s not necessarily the most happening place in Connecticut,” Sparkes wrote. “Basically, if you’re living in Westport you’re either married with a family or single and having a miserable time.”

But the designation may come as a surprise to many. Westport is, in fact, so boring that actor and philanthropist Paul Newman long made it his home.

The town is also home to the Westport Country Playhouse, the Levitt Pavilion for the Performing Arts and the Westport Art Center. It was unclear whether RoadSnacks thought those venues were boring, too.

It also boasts a robust and diverse downtown shopping area, dozens of restaurants and Compo Beach and Sherwood Island State Park as well as spots for sailing, rowing and boating. 

The hot spots in Westport, which show that the town is anything but boring, were featured in a Connecticut Fan Favorite Town Contest video on YouTube.

Which Connecticut towns are also boring? No. 1 West Simsbury, Orange and northwest Harwinton, among others, also made the list. (What's the least boring town in Connecticut? New London.) 

RoadSnacks, which claims to be based in Durham, N.C., seems to specialize in ranking towns in a negative way: It has ranked the most dangerous places and worst places to live in each state.

Rest assured, Durham is not on the “These Are The 10 Worst Places To Live In North Carolina” list. 

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